The first picture above shows the remains of a dish set my grandmother gave me around 1960. For some reason I was especially touched by seeing the poor broken coffee pot. The second picture shows the still-intact soup dish that I retrieved and washed.
I had never used the dishes…I don’t use china. But I was happy that my daughter was going to take them the next time she and Torben drove here. They weren’t her favorite pattern but she was going to take them because of the connection with my grandmother. Instead I did the connecting, looking up the pattern (Franconia Rose by Edelstein) on the internet and bringing back memories. My grandmother didn’t have much money, but it was important that she give my sister and me a good set of dishes, along with the cedar “hope” chest she had given us earlier. I still have the cedar chest, the memories and the gratitude that she would care enough to do that for us. Thanks, Grammy.
it’s the deep wonderful memories that neither fire nor flood nor theft can take from us, isn’t it?
this post brought a welling of tears.
but tears of happy.
I remember the line in “affair to remember”… ‘beautiful things always make me cry.’
something in the smouldering ashes and the white china lying there, waiting to return to the earth itself… beautiful.
tammy j
It always seems weird that just about everything is trashed and somewhere either just to the side or a layer down is a completely unscathed ‘whatever’ – it’s as if the fire-god, says: “well we shouldn’t destroy every memory”
tammy,
I was touched by the china in the ashes too. And almost overwhelmed by thinking of my grandmother wanting to do that for us.
Cathy,
I was surprised and grateful that not everything was smashed to smithereens. China isn’t quite as fragile as I thought.
Jean, you know my obsession with synchronicity. This had to happen. There is a message there and your post brings that out to me loud and clear.
So very interesting, Jean, what the eye SEES. You know like those black and white pictures: Is it a young woman, is it an old woman? Is it a vase, is it two profiles? Etc.
Initially, looking at your first picture, all I saw were shells, like you find down the beach. Beautiful. And then your narrative adjusted my mind and how to look at those “shells” as you intended.
Memories like the one you describe I call the jewels in our lives. Precious. Often their significance lost on others. Doesn’t matter. It is yours.
China and shells … many a tale to tell. Maybe. Some time.
Connecting,
U
U: I thought they looked like shards from an archaelogical dig until I read the connection with the intact china dish below…
Rummuser,
At the moment the estimate for cleaning up the debris is way too high. Maybe that’s telling us we shouldn’t rebuild?
Ursula,
I agree connections like this are highly personal. I was hoping it would remind people of connections in their own lives.
Cathy,
I can understand why you might think that. The picture makes it clear why archeologists rely on pottery shards so much. They do survive a lot of abuse.
I would not dare to suggest an answer. If I were you, I would follow my heart.
I agree with Rummuser, in the sordid end it is “the heart” and not much else…
Maybe you should wait some more…grieving the past times, let them go and then wait a bit more…just in case.
Or you could say “next Fall, build a very small, almost utilities only building and then spend a bit of time out there during the Summer” – more grieving but also some waiting time…
Or you could just abandon the whole place for a year…let nature rejuvenerate the space…use your “time out time” to go visit other places – i.e. take a holiday from that space…
Lots of “what if’s” I guess and it all rolls back to Rummusers idea of “the heart”
Rummuser and Cathy,
We know what we want to do. It’s just a matter if we can find someone to do it for a reasonable price. We hired an architect to do that part for us, but at the moment he’s falling down on the job. If it turns out we can’t do it, we’ll make other plans.
Hi Jean,
Its been along time, 2 years I believe.
Your post so heartbreaking, sorry for your loss.
It is amazin’ what makes it through a fire.
Your post so heartwrenching.
Diane
Diane,
Yes, it has been a long time. Thank you for the sentiment and for coming by.
So I read a few of your older posts to catch up a little. You have been going through lots. So your journey keeps moving along. I hope you can both rebuild a new dream there soon.
Diane,
We’ll have to see. We finally managed to get a start Monday, and things were going to happen Tuesday and Wednesday, but a flash flood washed out the road. (See http://www.flickr.com/photos/8185675@N07/6075855884 and http://www.flickr.com/photos/8185675@N07/6075854836 )
Hopefully the road will be fixed enough for trucks to drive on this weekend, and we can get something done next week. But there’s no guarantee it won’t happen again. Or that we will have enough money to swing it. There’s always the chance we’re pouring money into an infinite hole and will wind up with little or nothing.
bummer, for you both…