I read an interesting reaction to my post It’s More Fun Being the Painter. One commenter/fellow blogger wrote about it and received this comment:
Jean has the superior air of someone who has been privileged as well as lucky. Anyone who believes they have control over their life is delusional.
Ah, apparently she isn’t motivated by the quotes:
It is more fun to be the painter than the paint.
and
If you want your story to be magnificent, begin by realizing you are the author, and every day is a new page.
I do find them motivating. When life bops me on the head, quotes like these lift my spirits and remind me I’m not helpless, that life can still be an adventure. I mostly don’t use them very much, but this last year I dealt with shingles in my left eye, a separate eyesight problem, and an every-two-years DEXA scan that showed my regular efforts at the Y on the leg/hip machine hasn’t stopped my left hip from sliding down into the almost osteoporotic range.
One has to make decisions. I noticed the vision in my left eye was worse shortly after the shingles, but the local doctor said it wasn’t from the shingles, it was just a cataract. So I went to the cataract specialist in Santa Fe and he said, no, the cataract in that eye was no worse than the one in my right eye. I needed to talk to their retinal specialist about maculoschisis, the Swiss-cheezy-looking part of my macula in the picture below. The layers of the retina have split apart.
The only correction for it would be a vitrectomy, where they take the vitreous fluid out of your eye, which has its own risks, so we decided to wait and see if it gets worse. That was last October, and I’ll see that doctor again in April. I also have my regular exam here in a month, so I should also find out something then. All I can do is keep my fingers crossed, let them know if things get noticeably worse, and focus my energy and attention on something else.
I did a lot of research about my eye, and also about osteopenia/osteoporosis. The usual recommendation for OP is that I start taking medicine to avoid fractures, but I had trouble years ago when they wanted me to take some, so I’m going to say no unless I start getting fractures. I don’t want to be foolish about it, so I’ve tweaked my diet some and have made a lot of changes to the exercises I’m doing. I’ve joined the National Osteoporis Foundation support group and have gotten a lot of good ideas there. It’s been reassuring that there are a lot of non-drug things I can do to decrease the chances of breaking vertebrae or a hip. There are no guarantees, and the numbers aren’t that bad yet — only a 3% chance of a hip fracture in the next ten years, an 11% of any fracture — but the numbers have been getting steadily worse and I want to know I’ve played my part well.
So for me motivational quotes aren’t about trying to control life, it’s about handling the inevitable bumps in the road with good cheer. Have I been privileged and lucky? Of course. Compared to most of the people in the world, all of us bloggers have been. All the more reason to appreciate what I have now while I still have it and not complain when things don’t go perfectly. By now I have a number of tools to help me do that, and some motivational quotes are towards the top of the list. Not everyone likes this approach to life, and that’s fine too. It’s not about being better or worse, it’s about what works for each of us. What works for you?
January 26, 2016
All quotes, motivational or otherwise, have a role to play in communications. I use them as often as I can, which means, I need to remember the quote for appropriate situations and I maintain that one should not reinvent the wheel. By that I mean that if someone has already said something beautiful why try and improve on it?
Yes, they indeed lift up our morale when down and if they come at the appropriate time. When they do, I call that synchronicity.
Clearly a lot of people agree with us, that’s why quotes are so popular.
The medicine for OP can have serious side effects, I believe. I was told I should take it to put a halt to osteopenia, which I had several years ago. The alternative treatment, according to my doctor at the time, was to take on an extreme exercise program. I took that route (3 to 4 kilometers of hills and flat terrain a day) and ended my bout with that debilitating condition. Now, I admit, I was fortunate to be able to exercise to that extent, but I do know it works. I have continued to walk and go to the gym, so no re-occurrence. Hope this continues!
Yes! Best of luck to you. I’m glad it worked. 🙂
I’ve never heard you once adopt a superior tone Jean.
It’s also a delusion that we have no control over our life. We shape (to some extent) our circumstances and our circumstances shape us.
I assume she was having a knee-jerk reaction to the idea that people can help themselves. I’m guessing she would agree with this comic.
I’m mystified as to why your posts sometimes draw such comments. Superior? Ah, well, part of being the painter or author of your life lies in deciding how you’ll react to such unearned ire, isn’t it? I hope all medical tests this year bring better news, but I imagine you’ll build a satisfying life, no matter what the results might be.
I obviously don’t know, but I think this one is because of what I mentioned to Evan above, that the commenter was assuming anyone who talks about self-help, personal responsibility, agrees with the privileged people in this comic.
The time before was different. That person wouldn’t talk to me about it, but she went out of her way to attack me, first on this blog, then when I stopped that in emails to other people, then in comments on someone else’s blog. That one didn’t get far because two of my friends set the record straight. Some of the things she said contradicted one another, and some of them were stories she believed but weren’t true. It was so bizarre I’m not sure she could be held responsible. I’m 76 and Andy’s almost 81, so that could very well happen to us in the not-so-distant future. There are no guarantees.
Thank you for the good wishes! We hope to keep doing the best we can with what we have left. Best wishes to you, too!
wow, I probably shouldn’t even comment….
but ok-
First, I also hope that all your medical tests bring better news too.
I admire how you are able to handle the scary stuff and are able to do your own research and are informed about what’s going on and what different choices you can make.
I admire how you can see the value of a quote to remind you that there there is power in positive thinking and generally, well… it could always be worse.
it’s like that old saying of – I cried because I had no shoes until I saw the man with no feet.
but…
I understand also how when someone feels like they are deep down in a hole and the mud keeps sliding in, that a quote or a pep talk or whatever, can drive them crazy and make them scream. Scream because life is unfair and it’s not their fault that they are down in the hole. They feel helpless and powerless and see no way of climbing out.
but, I also think, if you feel powerless and negative and expect the worst, that’s what you are going to get for sure.
maybe life won’t be perfect if a person is happy and positive.
I mean, the sweetest person in the world can get Cancer and ultimately die of it but… the quality of their life, the happiness in their heart that they have in the time they have left, is in their power.
Sure, they can’t change the final result but they can damn sure change how they feel.
Once again, I’m all over the place and rambling but I hope you get what I’m trying to say.
xoxoxo
I can understand how a person could feel that way, too. That’s why I try not to spout quotes and pep talks to other people. I do use them for myself, and this blog is about sharing ideas and the things we care about. I do try to live my values, and quotes often lift my spirits and give me courage. But what works for one person doesn’t necessarily work for another. What works for you?
PS Thank you for commenting! And for posting on your art blog tonight and telling us about Rosie. She sounds like an amazing dog. I’m so sorry she’s ailing. It’s sad and scary.
I have used quotes from time to time – during various stages of my life – I have read all kinds of books/other on matters that pertain or not – some have become my “friends” as such, which I return to every now and then, not always the exact “friend” but something that appeals to me at the time.
I have created and re-created my destiny many times, sometimes on the advice of professionals, sometimes from interpreting certain things to suit me.
I don’t see myself as personally superior but I do feel that most of the time I control my own destiny… within whatever means I need/have…
right now I’m practicing in various modes: doing nothing is soothing my soul; mucking around with actually paint, glue, scissors and paper.
As you know, I’m really impressed by you — you’ve done amazing things with what you’ve been given. As usual, yay, Cathy!