Man is most nearly himself when he achieves the seriousness of a child at play.
—HeraclitusThere is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.
—Ernest Hemingway
Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly. That’s my favorite mantra when I try something new. It quiets my inner critic and gives me the freedom to experiment and learn new things without worrying about being judged.
For instance, when I first started writing an inner voice would say, “What makes you think you can write? Why would anyone want to read anything of yours?” The only solution for me was to get my ego out of the way and write in the spirit of sharing. It doesn’t matter if my writing is “good” or “bad”. The important question is, “Is it honest?” Does it accurately express one person’s way of experiencing the world? Maybe some people will be judgmental, but that’s not my problem. My job is simply to play my part well…to immerse myself in the process and leave the rest to the gods.
It reminds me of a child going with his mother to meet the teacher he would be having in his new school. During the visit he looked at the pictures on the walls and asked, “Who painted all those ugly pictures?” His mother was horrified at his rudeness and was going to intervene, but the teacher just answered, “Johnny, in this class people don’t have to paint pretty pictures, they can paint anything they want.” Johnny visibly relaxed…this school was going to be a safe place.
That feeling of safety is so important to learning. That’s one reason therapy reading dogs work so well in schools. The dogs are nonjudgmental and the children feel safe with them. Reading aloud is something to be shared with an interested listener rather than a chore, and the children look forward to doing it.
Children have to rely on adults to give them a safe learning environment, but as adults we can provide it for ourselves. So I no longer worry when my inner critic sneers, “What do you think you’re doing? What makes you think you can write? No one is interested in what you have to say!” I simply answer, “Yeah, sure. You’re probably right. And it doesn’t matter. I’m writing anyway, and you can’t stop me.”
Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly. And for me there are few things more important than writing.
So, that’s what I care about, and that’s what works for me. What about you? What do you care about…care about so much that you’ll do it no matter what other people might think? Please share your thoughts and experience in the comments section.
Thanks to Shamelle, Daz, Jenny, Paul, Noa, Bruce and Liara for commenting on last week’s post.
Jean, I found your blog through Personal Development Partners, and I really appreciate your viewpoint on so many things!
One of the most valuable creative ideas I’ve ever been introduced to is Anne Lamott’s “shitty first draft” from her book “Bird by Bird.” Basically, she suggests just vomiting on a page to get everything out of your system – THEN go back and structure, refine and edit things. It’s the best way I’ve found to just get started, which is the key for me in writing anything at all!
“Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly. And for me there are few things more important than writing.”
I love this Jean!! I’ve come sooooo late to realizing that we don’t need to be perfect (as if – lol). And writing – communicating – sharing our hearts – oh, YES! For me too, few things more important!!!!!!!
Maria,
As Woody Allen said, “Thank God the public only sees the finished product.”
I like Joel Saltzman’s mantra: “I’m going to have some fun here. I’m going to play around and discover some really neat stuff.” That’s the attitude I try to take. If I learn something, am changed, by something I write, then it’s a success. It’s even better if it connects with someone else.
Karen,
🙂 That’s what I love about blogging, the sharing of experiences and point of view. And connecting with kindred spirits. I love the attitude of your site.
Some people don’t show their true self. They’re afraid of being judged. They’re likely to be judgmental also. It’s more fun to be a free spirit.
bikehikebabe,
Thanks for coming by! 🙂
Jean, want to say thank you very much for this message. That reminds me on enjoying my blogging journey, to ease the tension of having to give my very best in every post!
Thanks a lot for sharing this! We all need this!
Have a great day!
Robert
Robert,
🙂 Thanks. I’m glad you liked it.
Jean,
New beginnings require much courage–rejection is a common fear, but the bigger shame is never to try. My theory is everyone has a story, this is mine.
Noa,
🙂 Thanks for coming by. That fear of rejection and abandonment is a strong one. I love blogging because we can talk about our unique experiences and connect with others who are interested in sharing.
i’m with you bhb. and monk, i loved this post.
most helpful!!!
i was raised by a perfectionist disciplinarian father.
i loved him so much. but he was hard on himself and
even harder on my brother and me. he died when i was
17 and my brother 14. so it took many years to over-come
what we thought was the only way to judge ourselves… by
perfect standards. well… NOTHING is perfect! lol.
now i can relax and actually enjoy my life. my brother, still
dealing with it, sadly.