Lately I’ve been reviewing some of the things I studied years ago, and at the moment I’m rereading Pierro Ferrucci’s What We May Be. Ferrucci studied psychosynthesis under its creator, Roberto Assagioli. After Ferrucci had been studying for about a year, he was drafted into the Italian army for his compulsory service. He was upset at the idea of having to waste the next 15 months, and he expected Assagioli to agree with him. Instead Asagioli said,
Great. Now you will learn to collaborate with the inevitable. This will be the most important part of your psychosynthesis training.
Ferrucci says he was so puzzled by Assagioli’s response that, instead of getting upset, he decided to try to understand and act upon it. Even though there were times he wanted the military training to be over, he agreed it turned out to be a profoundly valuable experience:
Assagioli’s teaching was clear now. When an unpleasant event happens to us, we can decide to accept it as it is, without complaining, because the universe does not adjust itself to our plans. As Marcus Aurelius beautifully states in his Meditations, we “don’t quarrel with circumstances.” Our first spontaneous reaction may of course be one of self-pity, evasion, or rebellion. But as we assume a positive, dynamic attitude of acceptance (not resignation or approval), we find that we can better understand what is coming our way, learn from its message, take advantage of the hidden circumstances it may offer, and, if we so decide, fight it effectively. In any case, we will be able to take responsibility for whatever choice we in fact have – choice about our actions, thoughts, and feelings – instead of simply blaming everything on the outside world. In the words of the Indian saying, “If you don’t want your feet to be hurt by thorns, you can try to carpet the whole earth; but it is easier and less expensive to buy a pair of
shoes.”
Just one more way of saying taking responsibility for our lives is empowering.
February 12, 2015
The serenity prayer sums it up beautifully.
Yes, that’s a classic. I still like mine better:
It’s a little bit livelier — it has a more creative spirit.
I do like the quote above about buying a pair of shoes instead of trying to carpet the world.
i have a wise friend. she will be 84 in june. you might remember her from the post i did of her… ‘child of the dust bowl.’
yesterday she was in line at the grocery store. the man in front of her didn’t use the bar to separate his items from the man in front of him. so the clerk obviously rang up three things before he noticed and stopped the clerk. THEN he began a tirade to the clerk. they got it worked out. but before he fumed off … he turned to my friend and said in a loud voice “AND YOU MA’AM ARE THE RUDEST PERSON I’VE EVER KNOWN!” my friend just stood there with her mouth having fallen open through the whole thing.
she didn’t say anything. the man stalked off.
the clerk thanked her for not pursuing it.
i asked her how it made her feel. she said…
“well. i’m trying something new for things like that. i’m trying to imagine that he might have someone at home who’s deathly ill. or he’s an exhausted care giver. or he’s in pain himself.”
i added … or then… maybe he’s simply a jerk. there are a lot of those out there too! LOL!!!
we have laughed at it a lot since. when we’re on the phone … i’ll say …
“now don’t be rude!” and we both dissolve into laughter!!!
i don’t know if this falls under psychosynthesis… but it has given me a new insight.
another cool post monk! xo
I love it! 😀
Excellent!
I like that Indian saying.
I do too!
It’s interesting how we conduct our lives, from whatever culture we are in.
I am having a continuing saga with the man next door (house in front) and his employees WHO have what seems selective hearing! This relationship to cars parked in my driveway… on Thursday two couriers came with packages – both had to park awkwardly sideways across end of the driveways – one had a very long, heavy package. It was a taxi van blocking them and cars were over in the other driveway (going to empty house) – so no one could drive up one and cross over the lip (2″ high concrete barrier).
Then something gorgeously funny happened, Asian owner of empty house turns up with a truck load of goods (storage) – he comes to my door is seems angry I would park in “his” driveway – I explain whose cars they are! He says to me if they park there again, “I get them towed”… I tell him you speak with man in front!
So on Friday, I decide to tell said employee “stop parking in mine” and he says “I thought you said we could” “no, I said short temporary parking for taxis”
I go out for the day, research for my proposed art/garden…when I get home, yes car is shifted it’s in Asians’ driveway which to me seems far more dangerous – “towing”
You might ask why “taxis” the guy in front services RT’s and accessories for taxis but his driveway/entry is minisule…
I have ANOTHER selective hearing problem via them that has more to do with what they have somehow felt I wouldn’t mind having in my basement garage…another time folks on that – no it’s not illegal stuff!!!
Good luck! Hopefully you managed to get through to them this time.
Jean, something definitely has filtered through as now – no car from his place, employee, visitors, excess are in other driveway – last night a friend came late, and he said “strange how there is a car in other driveway” and indeed it was there… today there is another car parked on other driveway!
Maybe they feel I’m going to get stroppy over goods in my garage and will sarifice my annoyance by obeying “no cars in my driveway” mode 🙂
BTW both these days are weekend parkers…plenty of room across the road to park at that curb (no businesses/homes have entrances right there) – our side is yellow markings which means no parking at this curb. A by-law to do with the fact this side all residential – the other side small apartment block with parking and bigger businesses that do have own carparking.
During the week this street is like a raceway at times, many employees in the area looking for parking that doesn’t cost…