A Mumbai businessman, Raphael Samuel, is trying to sue his parents because they had him without his permission:
His mother good naturedly says,
I must admire my son’s temerity to want to take his parents to court knowing both of us are lawyers. And if Raphael could come up with a rational explanation as to how we could have sought his consent to be born, I will accept my fault.
She also says she sees the logic in his argument and says she wished she had met him before he was born — if she had, she definitely wouldn’t have had him. Neat mom to see the humor!
Samuel doesn’t really expect any court to hear the case, and so far he can’t even find a lawyer to represent him, but he wants to make the point that it is all right for couples to decide not to have children.
I wonder if it is less acceptable not to have children in India than it is in the United States? I’m assuming attitudes here are a lot more relaxed than they were years ago, but I don’t really know.
Do you have any opinions on the subject?
February 7, 2019
I see nothing wrong with a couple deciding not to have children. It sure beats some of these people who have one right after another and don’t take care of them.
Amen to that!
Over the years, I’ve found that it’s complicated — I doubt there’s a one-size-fits-all answer. But we always hoped for children, but it never worked out. I mean, who knows, the baby we weren’t able to have might have grown up to be the person who invented a revolutionary green source of energy or found a cure for cancer. Maybe they would have brokered peace in the Middle East. Okay, probably not. 🙂 But I can honestly say, that I’ve never made a parenting mistake, not many can say that!! 🙂
The title of this post should have been “It’s All Right to Choose Not to Have Children.” It’s not that no couple should ever have children, it’s that couples who don’t want to be parents shouldn’t be pressured to have them. I think you would have been a fantastic mother, seeing how you care for your rescues.
I think Samuel is lucky to have the mother he has. He’s protesting the idea that children owe their parents a lot for having given them life, that children should live in such a way that make their parents proud. I agree with him about that and so does his mother.
Well, it’s an obvious fact that none of us chose to be born, it was our parents’ wish to have children and we owe them nothing at all except what we choose to do out of human kindness. Certainly we’re under no obligation to make our parents proud of us. And yes, of course it’s okay to decide not to have children. The world population is quite big enough as it is!
Not every parent agrees with you, some have high expectations for their children and it often doesn’t go well.
When our daughter was considering not having kids she worried that I would be disappointed not to have grandkids. I assured her it was fine with me as I could always borrow a child or two if I felt the need to do so. In fact, I started an adopt-a-grandparent program at church for young families whose own parents did not live locally. It was a success.
Kaitlin told me when she was a teen that she didn’t want children, that I would have granddogs and grandcats. That sounded great to me. 😀
I don’t have children from my now defunct marriage – I wanted them badly – but nothing was happening, so off to see numerous specialist and have numerous “not nice tests”…took potions at times – BUT still nothing. My ex’s doctor had said “it always the woman’s fault” – finally my dear doctor had words with said doctor and my “ex” went off to have a single test – he moaned and whined about it – all he had to was fill a tiny weeny bottle! All the time, gaily saying it was my fault – well the results came back – HE WAS COMPLETELY THE FAULT… that was went he became “mean-as” – it wasn’t the complete reason that he is my “ex” but it had much bearing on it…when one day, I’d had enough – I took him to our work place, and then drove away….I didn’t return to our business for near on a week!!
(much more happened…as you can imagine…)
Good Lord! I’m glad your doctor had more sense than your ex’s! And I’m sorry your ex was such a jerk about it, in addition to your not being able to have kids. I wish you had had kids and a good partner to share them with.
Seems to me that I know a lot of people who never had kids.
Or even married.
When I was young I just always thought I’d be married with kids.
It came as a surprise to me when I didn’t.
I just never met the right person and I couldn’t bear to be with the wrong one.
It used to make me really sad until I realized its not particularly something that I wanted but rather just something that was expected.
No, if I couldn’t have a family with my soulmate, then I’m fine.
And besides, I have my nieces, so I have the best of both worlds.
Good for you!
That’s the thing, it used to be expected and women who never married were “old maids”. My best friend never married and my uncle once said, “Mary never married, did she?” I said, “No, she was smart.” He laughed and said I was probably right. I wasn’t dissing marriage, I was dissing the idea that everyone was supposed to.
I’m sorry about my delay in answering this, but for some reason your comment got marked as spam. That shouldn’t have happened since you’ve commented before. 🙁