The Joy of Not Talking

Do you think there’s any truth in this cartoon?

I laughed because it reminds me of an incident in a sitcom a few weeks ago. I seldom watch TV, but a friend had mentioned the show and I was curious.

The father was a down-to-earth type with a genius son. The son wanted to go to a lecture at a museum and the father was happy to take him. He dropped the boy off and went to a nearby restaurant to enjoy a sandwich and watch a game on TV.

Unfortunately the mother of one of the girls at the lecture came in. She recognized the father as one of the parents so sat down and started talking to him about all of her problems with her husband. So much for peacefully eating and enjoying the game. The fellow tried to be polite to the woman while still keeping track of the game and his sandwich.

Then the woman saw her husband come in, didn’t want to be seen, so snuck off. Reprieve for the poor fellow? No, the husband sat down and started telling his tale of woe.

In the meantime the couple’s daughter had talked the son into leaving the lecture and going off to a restricted area of the museum to talk. They were just talking but got caught.

The next scene was the father coming home, hugging his wife in the kitchen, and telling her how much he loved her. He also told the wife that their son had gotten into trouble with a girl and was tickled about it. She didn’t agree, she thought it was a bad thing, but when he tried to persuade her she said,

I don’t want to talk about it!

He left the kitchen with a big smile on his face, saying,

That’s why I love you so much.

Yes, listening to other people can really help them at times, but it was refreshing to see another point of view.

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12 Responses to The Joy of Not Talking

  1. tammy j says:

    LOL. yes. I remember that episode. I think it was on this evening but I forgot to watch it. tv is kind of hit and miss with me. except for Frasier … which I always watched. at least until the last season or two!
    and as to the cartoon and ‘talking?’ I imagine it’s probably right!

    • Jean says:

      You didn’t like the last season or so of Frasier? The only episodes that stick in my mind is (one of?) the first, where he has to give up his chair so the father could have his old ratty one, and the very last episode when the father thinks Frasier’s old chair would have been just fine. It was the perfect ending.

  2. I agree with you! It reminds me of something my Mom used to say when people asked “how are you?” She’d sometimes say are you interested, or are you just asking to be polite?” I think we all ask, and it’s a polite and natural thing we ask, but maybe it’s a good reminder to be ready in case we aren’t ready, or interested or have time for the answer, whatever it may be.

    • Jean says:

      Good for her! That’s so much better than (1) saying, “fine,” when things aren’t and the other person really wants to know, or (2) letting loose with a lot of details when the other person was trying to be polite. Another answer I’ve heard is, “How much time do you have?” That’s a good warning and gives the other person a chance to say if they really have the time and interest in hearing the story. Thanks for the suggestion.

  3. or “mustn’t grumble…” reply to “how are you?”

    – I’ve got a friend who starts all text messages with “how r u?” and recently he got onto messenger/fb – same starting line…It really gets on my goat, when a simple “hello…” would work! And yesterday we bumped into one another real time…I said “hello S…” and he replied “how are you”

    lately I’ve only wanted to get on with a conversation as actually “I’m all good”

  4. This kind of reminds me of when I’m sitting in the break room at work reading and someone will come in and keep talking to me.

  5. nick says:

    Listening to other people’s problems isn’t always a good idea. They may genuinely want advice and take in everything you suggest, or they may just want to moan and whatever you say in reply they take no notice and you’re simply wasting your time.

    • Jean says:

      Sometimes even when they don’t want advice, they need some emotional support, someone to listen, so you can help by being there. But some people take advantage of other people, and at first it’s sometimes hard to tell the difference.

  6. Joared says:

    I think a lot of times people just want to vent — don’t necessarily want advice or someone to tell them what to do. The act of verbalizing can help some toward finding answers. They just wat someone to liste.

    • Jean says:

      I know, and sometimes it really helps. Other times it keeps people stuck. The trick is to know how to differentiate.

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